Biggest crotch bombs of 2009
FastLaugh.com Poll: Biggest Crotch Bombs of 2009
December 30, 2009
by shf
DESERT PALMS, Calif. (FASTLAUGH.com) — The results are now final…
Despite a very spirited and thankfully unsuccessful last-week-of-the-year-challenge by Umar Farouk Abdul Mutallab, the winner of FastLaugh’s “Who’s the biggest Crotch Bomb of 2009?” poll is…
Tiger Woods
As recently as a few weeks ago it appeared that Mark Sanford, the wandering governor of South Carolina, had easily clinched the crotch bomb gold medal for the year.
Then, in late November, as Sanford was prematurely taking a victory hike somewhere along the Appalachian Trail, Tiger Woods burst crotch-first into this year’s competition, snatching the lead from Governor Sanford and appearing to be a rock-solid contender for the award.
Umar Farouk Abdul Mutallab, a previously unknown contender for this year’s crotch bomb title, made a bold but unsuccessful Christmas Day gambit to wrest this year’s prize from Woods by literally scorching off his own crotch during an ill-fated Christmas Day crotch bombing attempt on a Northwest Airlines flight from Amsterdam to Detroit.
This year’s crotch bomb victory for Woods comes on the heels of him also winning FastLaugh’s 2009 “Colossally Unrecoverable Fall from Grace Award” (won by Bernie Madoff in 2008).
Final results for “Biggest Crotch Bombs of 2009″ are:
41% – Tiger Woods
40% – Umar Farouk Abdul Mutallab
11% – Mark Sanford
8% – John Edwards